I never write this before, and maybe nobody knows. I'm blessed that I met you in PDW. I'm blessed that i have you, everyday. I remember the first time we get close. When basic training, we have to do push up with our carrier on. I even forget what's the reason. It so hard, our carrier is so heavy, I'm about to cry, but then I looked at u. That momment, I know that u know what I felt, I know u understand the feeling. We cheer each other. Say to each other to keep 'tabah'. On that momment, I promise myself that I won't give up as long as u hold on too, I promise myself to take care of you if you are on hard situation. But then, the fact is u take care of me more than I do to u.
U are so selfless. Ur personality is amazed me. U said u join PDW to make yourself a better person. What an extraordinary reason. On the hard time like PDW, everybody else is just thinking how to get trough this. They just thinking about getting theirself safe. But u'r different. I can't count how many time did u do more for the group. U finish your task first, and then u help those who can't handle their task. U bring ur own food and stuff by yourself, but they at ur food too, and u never complain about that. U'r the one who willing to 'ngamil air' when nobody don't want to. U'r the reason that I stayed. I always remind myself that I can do it if u can too.
Ur strongness is unbelievable. Every morning when we do running at basic, u always run on the front. U can catch up the boys. While I can't. But u always remind me to stay strong. Even when longmarch, when ur back is injured, u still bring your own belonging and not complaining. We have a same bad habbit not to tel medic if we're hurt or sick haha. As I said before we always try to hide our weakness. When rawa laut, u got stuck on the mud but u don't give up. U trying to keep moving, even if u do, u will get sink deeper. Or in tebing, u can finish the first wall so quickly so they told u to do the harder wall, and when u can't, they kinda punishing u. Or in survival, when we almost cant make any fire to cook but u don't give up even a little. You keep trying to lit up the fire.
We get close because of their selfishness actually haha. I hate fake ppl, they oftenly try to look weak or sick in front of senior senior so they will get compensation. Whereas, all of us get trough the same thing. Me and you, we, try to face all of our weakness, tears, hurt, anger, all by ourself. We are there for each other when one of us get tired or sad. U r there for me, u help me get trough the hardest things on my life. And I thank you for that.
Do u remember that we used to shared sarungbag almost everynight, to prevent us getting cold. Even the senior sometimes wake us up in the middle of the night to ask us use our own sarungbag, and we tell them that my sarungbag (or yours) is wet. A little lie wont hurt, right? Or do you remember how we talked about our crush, the man behind our toughness. Sometimes we talked about our family. It always can distrack our mind from getting stressed in this PDW. We share our medicine, to clean our feet just before we sleep. How we got kutu air together and it's hurt as hell. How we help each other clean our feet and sometimes massages our feet. And I even wake u up in the middle of the night bcz I want to pee (or peeing already).
Do you remember that our bag is the heaviest because we bring too much food? You brought so much rice, while I brought so much snacks. We both like to eat. Even when basic, when the other gurl lost their apetite, we still eating like a pig. Sometimes I get mad because they just bring a little rice but they eat your portion. Sometimes I give my snack just for you, because u r the only one that I care about haha.
When I become danlas, u'r so helpfull. U know I have to done my task fastly cause I have to control the other groups, and u helped me with the bivac. You even give me some food to eat when I have no time to eat. You are so helpfull by helping other gurls to do their task faster, because they are morrons. Ah. just kidding. They'r just so slowww.
I know that I were so childist back then. I often cried because I think I can't get trough this. Every cold night when we have to sleep with wet clothes, and we just have sarungbag, not a warm and cozy sleepingbag. And u always there to hear me complaining and mumbling haha. Ur so mature tho.
When I sick, u take care of me. And when u sick, I take care of you. I remember how I get mad to other gurl because they try to wake u up when u'r sick. Heartless bitch, of course they'r not sick, everything that they do is depending on you tell to us to finish the group task. And after recovery, we even take a painkiller together to get trough rawa laut with our killing-kutu air. And then ka Ardilles found out then he took our med haha.
On longmarch, we can't stop eating haha. After recovery, our food supply is loaded up. We have chocolates, gula merah, candies, bengbeng, marshmallow, biscuit, etc. Yes we eat while walking. And I even walk and sleeping at the same time haha and you pull me when I walked to the wrong direction. We do the longmarch differently, you, try to keep your energy. While I can't stop singing because I get bored easily. I also remembered when your back get injured. It's killing me you know I'm so sad that u still have to walk with your carrier on even though u r injured.
Or how scared were you when we have to swim in the swamp on rawa laut. Because you can't swim haha. And we always holding hand to swim together. But when we have to climb up the embankment, u must be the first who can climb up then u helped me. We always waited for each other, even the senior senior yell to uss to keep moving. I really wish that I could help you on padang rawa, but we're soooo far I can't even reach you. I remember that one momment when I collected the shrimp that stranded at your carrier then the senior yelled to me to let the shrimp go. Or when we act like we're played war game at rawa laut because we have to swim in a row.
We always talked to each other in english because it's comfortable. Because not everybodey can understand what we're talking about haha. We sometimes talk bad about senior senior too haha. A senior even ever told us not to talk other than in Indonesian language. but we doesn't listen to her haha. It's not our fault that she cant understand haha.
Too much memories to shared here actually haha. The point is, thank you. And yes I missed u. I missed our toghetherness too. I always wish for the best for you and hopefully we can meet soon. xoxoxo
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